Monday, December 6, 2010

Pretty On The Outside

Meet Maybelline. She's been living in this hoarded house for some odd 50 years now, I believe. She has a story to tell, I guess you could call it her "life" story. Here is what she has to say:

My name is Maybelline and I guess some people would call me a hoarder. I'm not sure exactly when I started keeping everything but things sure have piled up around here. My house is a big ole mess but my life has been an even bigger mess from the get-go.

My daddy threw me away when I was just a little baby. My momma died while trying to get me out of her body and I guess my daddy never got over it. He took to drinking and running around and was never there to take care of me. As a child I lived with his sister for a few years but she already had 6 kids and I was just another mouth to feed. One day my daddy got blazing drunk and ran his truck right into a creek, they never found his body and my Aunt says that maybe he just ran off. You'd think family ties would be stronger here in the South but my Aunt turned me over to an orphanage with just the clothes on my back and that's where I stayed until I turned 18. It wasn't so bad... they fed me and gave me a roof over my head but I never had any stuff of my own.

I met my husband Cecil right before I left the orphanage. I was on my own and when Cecil proposed I jumped at the chance. We got married at the courthouse and moved into this house right here. Things were real nice at first and Cecil, well, he just doted on me. Before you knew it I was pregnant with his child. I guess my hoarding started then. I wanted my baby to have all the things I never had. So I started collecting things preparing for the birth of our child. Cecil would come home drunk, I guess he was a lot like my Daddy in that respect and sometimes he would kick the baby stuff around. I dunno if he was ready to have a child but once you got a bun in the oven there ain't no turning back.

Pretty soon I had an entire room all ready for the baby and he was coming soon. I know it was a little messy in there but I knew where all his baby needs were at. The day I birthed our son Henry was the most beautiful day of my life. It was hard because I had to do it alone, Cecil never came home from work that day, maybe he was working late or maybe he was just drinking again but I got the job done and had baby Henry all wrapped up in a bundle to show Cecil when he got home the next morning. I though Cecil might stay home with us a while but he had other business to attend to so he took off again and it was just me and baby Henry.

That was pretty much what my days were like... Cecil gone and me taking care of the baby. Anyone can tell ya that baby raising is a full time job and well... things got a little messier around here. One day one of the neighbors came by to see the baby. She was more interested in looking around at my stuff than seeing the baby. She was one of those high falutin' ladies who turn their nose up at almost anything. After she left it wasn't long before the authorities came knocking on my door. They wanted to come in and see the baby too I guess. I wasn't ready for any company that day and baby Henry was kinda messy and the house was too. I don't know what they were thinking but they told me I wasn't fit to be takin' care of a baby and that my house was dirty, messy and smelly and no kinda place for a baby to be playin'. That wasn't fair 'cause I could always find a clean nappy for his bottom and a fresh bottle for his mouth. They didn't wanna listen to a word I had to say and they took my child away from me.

When Cecil came home and found the baby gone well, he was pretty mad. He knocked me around for a while then he got really drunk. Drunker that I ever seen him before. He stomped upstairs and I fell asleep in my chair. The next morning I couldn't find hide nor hair of him. I looked the best I could but upstairs was kinda messy and I couldn't see much, so I figured he was gone. The next day came and went and that day turned into a week, then a month. After Cecil disappeared the house started to smell really bad, I figured maybe he left some of that deer he shot to feed us out somewhere but I couldn't find any of it. Of course Cecil left behind his old truck it was sitting out there rotting in the yard. It was all I had left of Cecil and I couldn't bear to part with it so I started hoarding it too.

The years went by and I just sat here in my house and collected things. I guess I felt like I had nothing left so I might as well have stuff around me, you know, to kind of comfort me. I even got me a cat to keep me company, but it seems like he done run off on me too.

So I spend my days waiting to meet my maker and just sitting in my little house here. The smell and the mess don't bother me none after all I just keep to myself and remember the good old days. It does get lonely at times so I've been thinkin' maybe I'll get me a dog.

Hoarder Dollhouse (view photos)


The Hoarder Dollhouse

This is a custom built dollhouse on a 1 inch scale. I put the house together and painted it with original colors. Every roof shingle was applied individually by hand. All of the items inside are securely glued into place.

Each and every item has been chosen with "Maybelline" in mind. There are literally too many items to list... every attention to detail was taken while making this hoarded work of art. Everything in the house is authentic and original. Every nook and cranny is hoarded and the house even has "dirt" on the floor, filth and "mold" on the walls. You can look at this house for quite some time and not see everything there is to see. There are many food items, old furniture, a basket of eggs, clothespins and even two bicycles. There is a stack of garbage bags in a corner and a pile of newspapers. Lots of dishes, pots, pans, and plates are strewn about. Some of the most striking details is the pile of "real" cat bones next to the overflowing litterbox. If you look closely you can find the "missing" husband by his legs poking out from under the bed! The abandoned baby crib is covered in cobwebs and the rusted out old truck is full of discarded car parts. Many hours of time and creativity went into this production from building the house, to hoarding it, to the writing of the story. Everything is of my own creation and this is a one of a kind work of art. No one has done anything like this before and this incredible and unique creation would be a welcome addition to any miniature collector or art enthusiast. Included will be a copy of Maybelline's "story" printed out on paper. No animals were harmed in the making of this house. The authentic bones are from owl pellets that often contain tiny bones from birds and small rodents. Owls can't digest animal bone so they regurgitate the bones and fur of their prey. The bones have been extracted, cleaned and sanitized. The bones are real as is the cat hair that is clumped around the corpse. The bones were obtained from PULPmiscellania who can be found on the website Etsy. The truck is a 1:24 scale International 1/2 ton diecast pick up truck. It has been "rusted" out and primed to obtain it's abandoned automobile look. 3 flat tires and a broken axel. The truck was provided by GarzCarz you can find him on ebay or on the internet. He specializes in authentic custom built diecast race cars.

Hoarding is a serious mental condition and should not be taken lightly. This is only my rendering of what a hoarded house would be like and while Maybelline's story is of my own creation, many, many people suffer from this difficult problem. I am also in no way advocating alcohol abuse or domestic violence. This house and the characters depicted are a work of fiction.

Email me at:

Thanks for looking! I am taking orders for more custom built hoarder dollhouses. Deposit required. A little infomation about hoarding: Definition: Pathological or compulsive hoarding is a specific type of behavior characterized by: acquiring and failing to throw out a large number of items that would appear to have little or no value to others (e.g., papers, notes, flyers, newspapers, clothes) severe cluttering of the person's home so that it is no longer able to function as a viable living space significant distress or impairment of work or social life Hoarding has been linked to a variety of mental illnesses including schizophrenia, but many experts believe it is a type of obsessive-compulsive disorder. Obsessive-compulsive disorders affect some 2 million Americans.